Please don't stop the music.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

The entire week has been total shit.

On tuesday, Jerald had to blurt out that I was sick to Sabar and she went on to treat me like a disease. (Thanks Jerald) JunJie came over to make it worse when she said she heard that I was sick and ask me to scram home 'cause she didn't want to get sick. That just made me feel like total crap again. Especially with people possibly blaming me for the amount of people falling sick in our class. I really felt like getting MC just to get away from people who look at me and think it's all my fault that people are getting sick. Later on, Elaine came to tell me and Jerald that she thinks we are floundering so now I have to write two essays over this weekend. Nice.

Then, on wednesday, because of the Bio SPA, they used our class and the things that were on my table were lost in the process. That includes my SRP, Physics SPA, other English papers and possibly my Vectors test since I can't find it anywhere. If anyone finds these things around the class please pass them to me because I've become a worrywart now worrying about other things I might've lost.

Thursday wasn't any better with the whole day basically doing tests/listening in class (the horror). Lit lesson with the Sec 3s were after school and I still feel horrible about it because I think my group did a really bad job at teaching them. Other groups were like so specific and stuff and my group was unprepared. Guilt aside, I went to watch Harry and his friends at Great World. I think I just really needed to relax because it was on impulse and I just like, smsed my sister to ask her to accompany me. Miraculously, we got two of the last four tickets O.O which weren't at the first row, by the way. It was at the fourth row from the front, which was just okay and my neck wasn't sore. Anyway, my reaction to the movie was something like this:

Okay, I don't really know what emotion Bernard is trying to express either but basically I was disappointed in the movie. Or more specifically, the director. It just felt like there wasn't much direction in the movie, and somehow the acting was all really weird altogether. Especially Emma Watson. She looked like she was struggling to convey some emotion but couldn't do so. Or maybe that was the whole point but still. This movie tried to concentrate more on emotions I guess but it wasn't very well done. Lavender Brown provided most of the entertainment in her role as a Ron-obsessed girl. There wasn't really a climax so the movie left me feeling really confused. After Dumbledore died, I was still expecting there to be something more because it felt like the real climax hadn't arrived yet but the movie ended. So, all in all, I just think it's not one of the best Harry movies. But then again, since I like the Potter books too much I'll probably just watch the movie a few more times again.

Yesterday I felt like crap again the entire day because I kept thinking about my lost items. I really pity Bernard for having to sit beside me 'cause I was basically moping the entire week and stoning. It's really pathetic and Bernard knows it himself too so he has to resort to talking to LeeChen and even asking Guo Wei to fill LeeChen's place so that he doesn't die of boredom sitting next to me. Went to Subway after school and somehow I felt really relaxed. I'm thankful for such things to bring me back to sanity. God.

6:33 PM

Monday, July 13, 2009

Why do so many people around me have to be such Drama Queens?

I don't deny the fact that I'm dramatic at certain times too, but seriously, I know too many overly dramatic people. The fact that I'm born into a family of Drama Queens makes it so much harder to escape Drama. There's the self-confessed selfish sister who makes such a big fuss out of everything and uses multiple swear words on a daily basis. Apparently, her PE teacher told her that some muscle in her leg was torn and she may never do sports again. She whines about not being able to do sports and right after that, goes off to swim at some random place in her continuous effort to lose weight. Doesn't make sense. Never will.

Then there's the Queen of all Drama Queens: my mother. Constantly cries about how unfilial me and my sister are and complains about me to her church friends. When I came back from school just now with a high fever again, she makes a big commotion and asks my sister to run (which my sister then retorts with a reminder of her possibly-useless-forever legs) to the clinic to register my name first. Then, she forces me to rush to the clinic (which is a different clinic from the one I visited JUST ONE DAY AGO). At the clinic, I say that it's too early to determine whether the first doctor I went to is good or not, and she starts ranting about my fickle-mindedness and saying that if I don't want to see the doctor, she can just tell the person at the counter and we can leave. Mind you, it was her idea in the first place. I told her that and she blamed my sister for registering. Nice. When it was my turn to see the doctor, she went in with me and made unnecessary comments (like reacting with a gasp and an "Ahh" in a told-you-so kind of tone when the doctor showed her that my temperature was 38.8). She also told the doctor that she boils Barley but I never drink it, which prompts the doctor to ask me to co-operate with "Mommy". This reminds me of BLim who called my mother "Mommy" too. Then she proceeds to fish out the medicine from the other doctor and the two of them complain about how incompetent the other doctor is, because he apparently gave me some old medicine.

By the way, the moment we went out, she totally forgot what the doctor said. She only remembered the part where I must co-operate with "Mommy" and even tried to use it against me. Sometimes I wonder if it's a good or bad thing that both my sister and I inherited such dramatics.

Anyway, the doctor said he was surprised I could survive with such a swollen throat. His exact words were: "Don't you feel pain?", which can be interpreted in two ways. Either he's calling me a human being with no feeling or it's a sincere question. I wanted to scream in his face that YES IT HURTS LIKE HELL WHY DO YOU THINK I'M SITTING IN FRONT OF YOU RIGHT NOW but decided to save my throat from anymore strain and replied curtly with a "Yes". Also, he commented on my medical history and said that I suffer from a lot of throat inflammations and infections. Weird. Maybe I sing too much. Another weird thing is that the lady at the counter couldn't find my name in the computer, so my mother asked her to try different combinations of my name. Like, "Daniel Chee", "Daniel Tao" and other variations derived from my full name. Even my NRIC number didn't register with anything in the computer. In the end, she found it randomly when she saw a "Chee".

In another random part of my head, I was thinking about analogies of life and death. I think the one I can relate to the most is a bicycle ride over a hill. The journey's tough, but eventually I'll reach the peak and the rest, as they say, is history. Which in this case, refers to the exhilaration of gliding down a slope on a bicycle. Seeing as how I don't know how to cycle, I'll just crash and then die. Even if I'm able to hit the brakes, inertia will probably just fling me a hundred feet into the air. That really isn't such a bad thing because at least I know that just before I died, I enjoyed life. Okay, exaggeration. But still, I really shouldn't waste life being so concerned with petty little things and people who don't appreciate me. See, there's always a lesson to be learnt from every weird thing I say.

School was pretty messed up today because I spent half the time coughing/blowing my nose/drinking water, and the other half was spent on worrying about homework and Maths. Thankfully, I'll be able to pass the CT. Or at least I hope I will be. During Literature, I was praying fervently that my temperature wasn't going to shoot past 37.6 because I couldn't afford to be sent back home. It didn't have enough time to climb to that temperature and stopped just 0.2 degrees under that. Whew. And to think the doctor took a few seconds just to measure a temperature of 38.8.

Okay that's not the point. The point is, (I'm back to Drama Queens), that when you've been faced with so much superficiality your entire life, just a little hint of it can drive you crazy. I think that's what's been happening with me lately. I'm getting irritated real easily at certain things (okay maybe this is just my problem), and I'm beginning to see things for what they are. To quote Rihanna,

But you put on quite a show,
Really had me going.
Now it's time to go,
Curtain's finally closing.
That was quite a show,
Very entertaining.
But it's over now.

Except in this case, I never believed a single bit of your shit.

11:38 PM

Sunday, June 28, 2009

This stinks.

I'm still wondering whether I should be doing my homework or not. That's my problem. I always think about whether to do it, how to do it, when to do it, but never actually do it. This is so potentially Nike -.- Just do it. Procrastination is an evil thing. It's like a demon that comes slowly and consumes you until you never get anything done. That's why, the whole of my saturday was spent on the computer and sleeping. Just great. Well, at least I had some fun on the computer. Listening to music is all I need. And youtube, of course. My sister was trying to do the Hoedown Throwdown and she got it all wrong. HAHA. If you don't already know, the Hoedown Throwdown is one of Miley Cyrus' songs from her movie. Speaking of which, it's quite a typical predictable movie. I only wanted to watch the part where she sings 'The Climb', but that can be found on Youtube. And her love interest in the movie is a teenager but why is his voice so deep -.- I want a deeper voice. And then,

Me: I want some Beatles music.
Sister: *in high pitch* How deep is your love...
Me: *shoots her a look* That's the Bee Gees.

Anyway, all I did was one English comprehension and Reader's Digest. I don't understand why I did the useless ones. And all this is due on the second freaking English lesson on Term 3. I should be doing stuff like Literature, Chinese or Maths. Or Humanities. Which are all still left untouched. Heh.

Change the way you look at things and the things you look at will change. I think this quote came from some inspirational writer that went on Ellen. To be honest, I think it's corny. I'm not saying that it isn't right in its own ways, since perception is such a powerful thing. The one thing I've learnt is, the only thing that matters is what you think and what the people you care about think. I don't even want to talk about societal perceptions since that's such a recurring topic in Lit. Then again, I would need some serious Lit recap. This reminds me of my missing TKMB. And TKMB reminds me of 2kmockingbird. Because k = kilo. It's okay if you don't get it; it came from a lame source.

I went around to people's blogs and tried to go through their archives and see how we were like way back in Sec 1. I was ... Naive, to say the least. But then again, I remember I really enjoyed myself and the way I was living my life. I'm more aware of the world now, but to think back on how I was focused only on my little bubble that contained my friends and I, I have to say that I really want to go back to those days. Sometimes not knowing everything makes things much clearer. Then again, I'm reminded of people I left behind, friends I gave up on, and I really don't want to be that person I was. My thoughts constantly change, and God knows I get irritated really easily, so it's no surprise I've made horrible choices in the past. Right now, I think all I can do is to cherish the people I care about and be thankful they're not put off by me. I hate that I'm so insecure that I have to surround myself with so many people, people who couldn't be bothered about what I think. Actually. I don't know why I'm thinking about this.

Imagine if I suddenly become such a reflective and thankful person and stop being sarcastic. I think I'd shudder at the thought of not being able to express myself through sarcasm. I think I'm just mean. Oh well. My sister is blasting Michael Jackson and it's giving me a headache so I think it's time to notice that pile of homework lying on the floor. Yes, it's on the floor. I threw all the contents of my bag on the floor cause I was too frustrated with it.

1:55 PM

Friday, June 26, 2009

Random update.

First Farrah Fawcett, now Michael Jackson? Is this some death period for famous icons? There are people out there struggling with horrible things like cancer and here I am struggling with homework and thinking I'm going to get screwed by exams. It's time I lived my life the right way. Speaking of homework, I somehow get reminded of hypocrites who tell people that exams are not the most important thing, and all this while they're secretly mugging away.

Nice.

3:44 PM

I think. I'm at a point in my life where it's do or die.

I'm sitting in front of the computer and eating tiramisu (which I feel has some alcohol but my sister a.k.a the alcoholic doesn't think there's any) that they brought back from the restaurant they went to on Father's Day. I don't know why, but I kept thinking it was a Japanese restaurant so I refused to go and I felt kind of lazy and sleepy. Turns out, it was an Italian restaurant and I missed out on it. God, I feel stupid. My mum was telling me, while I was scraping at the complimentary tiramisu cake (they became members (?!?!)) that they brought back, that she ordered some beef thing and it was quite a small piece on a really big plate. I gave her my -.- look and told her that's what you get for going to some Italian restaurant. Apparently my sister had pasta so it was a better deal since it was quite filling. They spent more than a hundred bucks @.@ I've never seen them spend so much except for like, important stuff. Dang I should've went.

Three consecutive days of Physics remedial. Wow. I have to say, it's quite creepy now that I know he knows what's going on in blogs 'cause he knows that people post what he says on their blogs. That's three "know"s in a sentence. This reminds me of the movie 'Knowing'. Okay, deviating from the main point here. Anyway, I feel like I have to censor things now. It's really weird. But, knowing myself, I'll just say it all out anyway. I was bored to tears. Today I could've cried. Literally. This is how I spent the three hours: half of the time talking to someone beside me (though today I stoned at my bag 'cause there wasn't anyone interesting near me), a quarter of the time doing the worksheet he gives out, an eighth of the time daydreaming and the last eighth of the time trying to absorb whatever he's trying to teach. Honestly, I don't need remedial for last year's topics. I need this year's ones. Guess that speaks volumes about their teaching abilities. I'm not saying he's not smart, he's just not a good teacher.

I realise I really miss blogging. Huh. I guess writing really is my passion after all. That's why the drama route in JC is so tempting. I'll be able to write about the types of plays and give CRITIQUE. God knows I've got alot to say about stuff. I'm just only able to write it down, not say it out. Then the performing in public part just brings out memories of stage fright. I swear my stage fright's horrible. During NanHua Speaks, I pretend I'm blind and everyone else isn't really alive and I'm speaking to myself. Also, there aren't concrete scripts, just a basic one for the storyline. So that just makes me feel more comfortable. But in drama, you do have to memorise a script. And I'm like a human Dory.

I feel. Insignificant.

Well, I think I'll go back to eating my tiramisu. And spending my time watching random videos online. Such a great way to de-stress. Though I'm probably the person with the least amount of stress, even though I'm left with the most amount of homework. Ironic, huh? I just had a random thought. I think I'm not good with commitment. That's why I don't have lasting friendships. God I need to change this. Oh interesting: my sister's freaking out about the fact that she has a flu. She came back from church camp in Malaysia and she went out like, everyday for the past four days since she came back. And she's getting horribly paranoid about H1N1. It's funny. I just had another random thought. I think for girls, older brothers are better than younger ones because the younger ones are just like pests. Most girls I know don't like their younger brothers that much. Actually, just referring specifically to SiewKiang. Haha.

It's weird when I start writing and everything just flows out. Well, then. I better stop before some horrible thought comes out and I write it down here.

p.s. I can't believe I proofread my posts to check for grammar, spelling and whatnot mistakes. I'm such a dork -.-

12:03 AM

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

So, I was really bored and I ripped this off of facebook.

1) Put iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
"One Step At A Time" - Jordin Sparks
Hey! I have a smart Windows Media Player.

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
"Sexy Can I" - Yung Berg
O.O Okay I honestly don't know what this song is doing in my WMP. Wahahahaha.

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
"Don't Forget To Remember Me" - Carrie Underwood
Freaking smart. It produces like, smart stuff. Lol.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
"With You" - Chris Brown
Huh I guess it's to be with you? GOD. This is weird.

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
"Keep Holding On" - Avril Lavigne
More proof of the genius of my music player.

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
"Love Story" - Taylor Swift
We're all in a freaking love story?! -.- Well, this is what you get from JieJun's rumour box I guess.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
"Harder to Breathe" - Maroon 5
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
"The Climb" - Miley Cyrus
I guess I really want to climb something?!

WHAT IS 2+2?
"Wherever You Will Go" - 3 Doors Down
?!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
"Superman" - Five For Fighting
O.O

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Wind Beneath My Wings" - Bette Midler
What!?! Hahaha.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
"Misery Business" - Paramore
Totally.

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
"T-shirt" - Shontelle
I knew something stupid was bound to appear -.-

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
"Smile" - Lily Allen
Awwwww. True.

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
"Low" - Flo Rida
Riiiiiight. I'm taller than my mum okay!

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
"Womanizer" - Britney Spears
My wife will totally get the wrong idea HAHAHAHA. If I even want to get married. Oh then I should dance with all the ladies!

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
"Superstar" - Lupe Fiasco
Again, TOTALLY.

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
"Just Dance" - Lady Gaga
So. Not. -.- Someone should write a song called 'Just Sing'. That'll be my hobby then.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
"Fly On The Wall" - Miley Cyrus
All of you are insects -.- Eh don't come near me.

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
"If I never See Your Face Again" - Maroon 5.
Well. The title says everything, doesn't it?

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
"Built To Last" - Melee
No. God. Lol. I won't die?! Right.

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
"If I Ain't Got You" - Alicia Keys
I swear I'm not doing anything O.O Awww too bad I don't have anyone HAHA.

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
"Man In The Mirror" - Michael Jackson
I laugh at myself?!

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
"Pocketful Of Sunshine" - Natasha Beddingfield
True. Sunlight does hurt my eyes.

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
"Make It Mine" - Jason Mraz
O.O WHAT?!

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
"Valerie" - Amy Winehouse
Sorry JieJun. WAHAHAHAHAHA.

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
"Realise" - Colbie Cailat
Erm. They just haven't realised it yet? HAHAHAHAHA.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
"The Man Who Can't Be Moved" - The Script
Right. I'm going to move him aside -.-

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
"Unwell" - Matchbox Twenty
Oh well. I guess I'm going to be sick today.

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
"Amnesia" - Britney Spears
Right.

Oh well. That's done. And I'm running late for Physics cause it's in an hour -.- Whatever.

8:00 AM

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Well, then.

I haven't been up to anything the past week or so so I don't really have much to talk about. Damn I've not stepped out of my house at all for the past 4 days (?!) Okay I need to get a life? All I've been doing is going online, chatting, facebook-ing, watching videos. I noticed YeeLing's score for Geo Challenge was like, getting higher by the minute and I feel threatened so I basically played Geo Challenge for an hour straight. Non-stop. And I'm a good 9000 points away from her :D Also, my brain is filled with so much Geography that it would probably blow up from excessive Geo Challenge-ing and flags of countries would spill out instead of brain matter. Coooooool.

Right. I sound like a kid. Moving on.

I guess the only thing I really can update on is the outing on Wednesday? The eight of us: Me, The Chin, Jereald (HA!) (This is JJ, by the way), Eunice, WeiJia, SinYi, JiaYu and XiuHuan went for the Sakura buffet at West Coast. Bottom line is, it isn't really good for eating. Though I practically binged on cakes most of the time and kinda enjoyed eating a whole bunch of chocolate, they don't offer much of a variety of food and it's kinda Malay? Maybe it's cause it was next to a mosque so it seems more practical to have Malay food. I don't understand, though, why they don't have normal buffet food. Weird. By the time it was over, I was really full and could barely drag myself anywhere, let alone the bowling alley -.- We kinda slacked around the park for awhile 'cause Eunice needed to tie her hair and I guess everyone was more or less shagged. Each time we saw a squirrel, we would go, "OOOOHHHHH..... AHHHHHHH.......YAYYYYYY" Okay, it was like, only me, SinYi and JieJun doing that. Obviously we weren't really excited -.- Someone suggested feeding peanuts. Hahahahaha. Acorns, people.

We were supposed to meet WeiQi for bowling (well obviously like, only me, Chye and J were going to bowl), and in the end she was late and didn't bring socks. So only the guys played, and it was like two games each and then we were headed for YeeLing's house *cue the double-take: Huh?!* It was really funny I guess 'cause Yeeling's a reknowned comedian (as we all know) so maybe it wasn't much of a surprise that her whole family's hilarious. I think that'd be really cool. Waking up everyday to watch a comedy. YeeLing's mum spoke to me in Mandarin and I didn't understand @.@ God that was embarrassing. YeeLing has a life-sized Tweety Bird in her house (cool right?!). I would want one, but only if it were like, baby Bugs Bunny. Or, it could be Storm/Jean Grey. Okay now I just sound sick -.-

Was this weekend like Church camp week or something. I know so many people who had their church camp over the weekend. In fact, my sister isn't back yet. Huh. Religion is. Necessary? No. Comforting? No. Weird? To me, I guess. I just can't bring myself to commit to a religion, I don't know why. Actually, I can't really say that, since the only religion I'm allowed to believe in is Christianity. If I were a Buddhist, my mum would kick me out for sure. So I guess this makes me an Atheist? Speaking of which, JieJun and I were at Redhill MRT Station and this was a long time ago but who cares. This Christian guy came up to us and I knew for sure it was like, his evangelism day or something. He asked if we were Christians and I said "Yes" (Oops I lied) and JieJun said "No" -.- So the guy got really carried away with talking about Jesus and he's Jehovah (which I was telling JieJun, the guy doesn't know how to spell Jehovah) and it made JieJun feel really insulted because along the way, the guy started to speak lowly of other religions. Even my sister says that the guy shouldn't have talked about other religions being unreal. So I'm thankful for the Christians in my life who do not force me to be a Christian. Those who do, however (my mother), well I can't do anything about it.

Huh. I said I didn't know what to blog about and now I can't stop blabbering.

I need to start doing my homework or else nothing will get done and I'll probably regret it and blame myself if I don't do well for O's. Then again, I really would love to see what happens if I do badly. I keep staring at my pile of homework and all I think about is, "I'm hungry and I need some chocolates". Then I'll go to the fridge and put chocolate sauce on everything I eat. Okay kidding.

Ellen DeGeneres rocks. She was giving this commencement speech at some university and she broke up the word "commencement" into the words "common cement", then she linked it to sidewalks. Isn't she funny? She ended the speech by saying: "Just remember this: You're gonna be okay." Then she pauses and continues, "Da da du dum .... Just Dance." And she goes down to the audience and starts dancing. Classic.

I guess that's it then. So much for an update. Literally, so much for an update.

Okay it isn't funny -.-

8:51 AM